Wednesday, March 31, 2010

Strange things...

You know there is always something that happens that makes you go hmmm... where did that come from? The past couple of years have been very hard emotionally. The loss of a child whether it is through miscarriage, still birth or any other way is very devastating. It takes everything out of you. You never forget that child. You always wonder who that baby looked like, if it was a boy or girl, color of hair, color of eyes. You wonder what it would have been like to hold that baby in your arms the first time. You have grief,heartache and many other emotions that honestly never go away. You wonder if you did something to cause it.

I was going through my blog this morning and reading old posts. Mainly to have a good cry. Before I could cry while I was reading "In Memory" my phone rang. It was the mother of a childhood friend. She said "Just wanted to ask if you were trying for a baby?" I was a little shocked, I mean what else would you think. I didn't really know how to respond so I told her that I would love to have another baby more than anything. I have just lost hope of it happening. She then replied with "Well - when the baby gets here I would love to babysit for you".

I hope this is a sign that we are about to get good news. Maybe our prayers are about to be answered. Who knows. Maybe the Easter Bunny will bring the best news possible. Sure would be nice.

Tuesday, March 09, 2010

My Prayer...

Almighty God, hear my prayer and the wishes of my heart.
You know my deep desire for a child -- a little one to love and to hold, to care for, to cherish. Grant that my body may conceive and give birth to a beautiful, healthy baby in Your holy image. Guide me in all my choices so that this conception, my pregnancy and my baby's birth are in line with Your will. Heavenly Father, hear this prayer of my heart, mind and spirit.Amen!


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